How to Calm an Angry Child-Video

A few weeks ago, I posted a blog on how to calm an angry or upset child. The response was pretty phenomenal, so I decided to follow-up with a video that shows you exactly how to do it.

I’ve posted the video on YouTube and embedded here for your convenience. I welcome your comments. If you find this useful, please feel free to share it with your friends and family.

I developed this innovative technique in my mediation practice and in my advanced mediation training workshops. I further refined it in the Prison of Peace Project, and then started teaching it to high school and middle school teachers in the Fresno Unified School District.

What is remarkable is that the time it takes to calm down an angry or upset child with these skills takes less effort and time than trying to win an argument. I demonstrate this on the video. In the first scene, I set up a typical argument. It lasts for about 25 seconds. Most arguments with kids, as you know, last longer. The following scenes are all about 20 seconds or so in length. The kids, who are my niece and nephew, obviously were acting their parts. However, I did not coach them on how to respond to the use of the listening skills. Instead, I directed them to try to push the argument. Even Skye couldn’t be stubborn in the face of my empathy, hard as she tried.

I have received many emails of amazing stories about how this has changed lives. I would love to hear your story, if you have one, after you experiment with these ideas.

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